When I notice people judge me, I don’t make them wrong for it. I remember if they are judging me, they are probably judging themselves as well.
I don’t pity them either, because that would also make the judgement they have of themselves real.
I just don’t give it any power.
And it makes me look like I don’t care. Because I don’t react.
The truth is, I care much more than anyone knows.
I care so much that I look at every possibility of what may have triggered that judgement. I also look at what I can say or do that would make them stop judging themselves.
I know this sounds like a lovely theory, but it works oh so well.
I broke up a relationship with someone I cared for very much once because we seemed to have too many problems understanding each other. The next day, I did a video with a friend and we laughed. I posted it online. It seemed like I did not care about our breakup but the truth is I cared so much I did not want to make the other person feel they had to make me feel better. I made the choice to break up and I needed to do what I had to do to get better. I care a lot about him, and still do.
We throw a lot of expectations at each other in relationships. Caring is knowing when we do have an expectation and doing everything we can to let it go. I don’t expect anyhting from anyone anymore but I am so appreciative of the people who are as kind as they seem to be.
The same way than when someone is judging you they are actually judging themselves, be aware that when someone seems to not care they might actually care a lot.
It just does not look likewhat you think it looks like.